The Wounded Healer

The concept of "the wounded healer" is a notable one among chaplains. In its simplest terms, it paints a picture of someone who has gone through an experience and uses the fruits of such experience to life-coach or mentor others. It helps in therapeutic relationship and therapeutic communication, because the counsellor better understands the feelings of the counselee. He who feels it, knows it — empathy is promoted over and above sympathy.

A wounded healer understands the feelings, emotions, and pains of a counselee because he has been in a similar situation. He understands the tears because he has also cried before. A wounded healer makes a better chaplain because he has walked a similar path — nursing his own wound while still attending to the wounds of others.

A wounded healer is not carried away by personal stumbling blocks but uses them as stepping stones to be of service to others. Wounded healers do not impress; their focus is on expressing to their counselees. A wounded healer with ten bondages will not use all of them to tie his ten wounds — he will reserve one bondage to tie the wound of another.

Wounded healers are non-judgmental. They do not judge and condemn others passing through physical, emotional, or spiritual disorientation or crisis. A wounded healer understands confidentiality, transference, and counter-transference in chaplaincy practice — and understands the ministry of presence. Passionate and thriving on hope, meaning, direction, compassion, reconnection, and reconciliation, chaplains who are wounded healers make better counsellors.